My SIL

[devika235]

My Sister-In_Law(SIL) hubbys sister is very starnge person. She visits us 3 times a year for long vacations and she makes my life hell. She will criticize each and everything I do from the way I keep my house,cooking,dressing,....
She would take from my hubby as much as she can. She will ask my hubby for sarees,shirts for her hubby,clothes for her kids and household item. Three time a year become too much.
I cannot say anything to her as she takes pity wave that her hubby is not treating her well. Now she wants big screen TV.
Please advice. I am tired of her visits.

[malspie]

Hi Devs,

It is important to know are you financially independent, do you have kids, how secured are you in domestic and career front.

[devika235]

Thanks Mals.
I have good family life otherwise. My hubby changes colors only when he meets his sister. I make money but not that much that I can support my family with my income. I do have a sweet little angel.
I dont know how to handle my SIL

[ashmita]

Devika, Can you not talk to your SIL's hubby. If he is a friendly persona and you think he can understand you, can talk to him about the problems she is creating between you and your hubby.
He can make her trips less.

[malspie]

Hi Devika,

I think the best way of fighting out a problem is to tackle it with your head and not heart.

Let me try, if I can help you as we had similar cases (rather 2) in the relative circle. I was too young to advice any of them at that age, now I can try and help you out as I can understand what you must be going through.

If you retaliate or seek help to stop your husband from helping her out, it may backfire on you. I also feel your SIl's husband is secretly enjoying the freebies and hence he is not stopping her. Who will!!

Why dont you initiate to help your sister-in-law instead of your husband? You start getting her things that she wants, then slowly your husband will gain confidence in you and start directing his sister to you and now you can pinch the purse and get her what she wants instead of showering her with luxury by our hushand.

[banishapa]

Devika
It is best to deal with SIL on your own. Hubbys does not like to listen anything against their family. It is pointless talking to them about their family as they live in denial. This situation can be handled diplomatically without hurting yiour hubby.

[devika235]

Thanks Gals for your advice.
Mals and Banisha, I think your trick will work. My SIL is visitng us this summer. I have started little bit of phone conversation with her to develop some good relationship. I can shop for her this vacation. I will update you gals when she visits.